When I was an associate in Anderson County,
back in the 80s, one Saturday I had taken a group out in our church’s bus. We arrived back in the afternoon and I
parked the bus in the lot across the road from the church. I parked, as always, as the back of the
lot, which had a slightly downhill angle to it. I went on about my day, and later that evening, when I came
home, there was an odd message our own answering machine. It was from the minister of the church
and it seemed so strange that I couldn’t get it to register in my mind. The message said something about the
church bus being in the garage of the house down the hill from the parking lot.
I drove out to the church to see what had
happened, and pulled into the parking lot across the road from the church. We always parked the bus at the back
end of the lot, but when I pulled into the lot the bus was not there. That’s a bad feeling, I can tell
you. I parked my car and walked
across the lot and when I got near the edge of the lot I could see the bus, and
it was in the garage of the house down the hill, which was owned by a couple
who were members of the church.
But the bus wasn’t really in the garage in the
way a car is parked in the garage.
Obviously, the garage wasn’t built to hold a full-size school bus. The bus had rolled down the hill and
into the corner of the house. The
front of the bus was partially in the garage and the rest of the bus had taken
out the corner of the house.
As far as I could guess, I must have failed to
set the parking brake on the bus, and might have left it out of gear as
well. I don’t know for sure, but
that was the best guess I could make.
I stood there at the edge of the parking lot for a bit just staring at
that bus in the side of the house, and I knew I had to walk down to the house
and talk to the people who lived there.
It was only about a hundred yards, but I it took me two hours and
forty-seven minutes to walk that distance. When I walked up to the front door I stood there for about
an hour before summoning the courage to ring the doorbell. In a moment I could see through the
window in the door that someone was coming to answer the door. I was younger and in pretty good shape
at that time, so I wondered about turning and running and not stopping. But the door opened and I was invited
in.
Failure is really difficult. What happens when we fail one
another? What happens when
husbands and wives fail each other?
When parents fail their children?
When children fail their parents?
When employers and employees?
When friends fail each other?
When ministers fail their congregations?
Today we begin a three-week series titled Failure Isn’t Fatal! We will look at failure through the
lives of three Biblical characters – Peter, David, and Moses, learning some
lessons from the failures of each of these three individuals. I chose those three because they had
some whoppers when it comes to failures.
They experienced failures that, unfortunately for them, have lived on
for millennia. Next time you fail,
offer a prayer of thanks that yours aren’t written down and remembered for all
time.
Peter has the misfortune to be remembered for several failures. The first one that comes to mind,
certainly, is when he denied Jesus three times (Matthew 26:69-75; Mark
14:66-72; Luke 22:54-62; John 18:15-27) which all four gospels record. There is also the time that Jesus
invited Peter to step out of the boat and onto the sea (Matthew 14:22-36; Mark 6:45-56; John 6:16-24). For a few steps Peter remained above
the water, but then doubt crept in and he sunk into the water. There is the time in the book of Acts
when God gives Peter the vision of the animals in the sheet and tells him
everything is clean, but Peter struggles to accept it (Acts 10:9-16). That failure foreshadows the struggle
Peter has to accept the Gentiles who begin to come into the church in large
numbers, and his failure to accept them causes Paul to rebuke him publicly
(Galatians 2:11).
The failure of which we will read this morning
comes from the end of John’s gospel, after the resurrection. On the surface, it doesn’t seem like a
failure, but a closer look reveals that it is an interesting combination of a
failure on the part of Peter and a very interesting response on the part of
Jesus –
15 When they had
finished eating, Jesus said to Simon Peter, “Simon son of John, do you love me
more than these?” “Yes, Lord,” he said, “you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Feed my lambs.”
16 Again Jesus said,
“Simon son of John, do you love me?”
He answered, “Yes, Lord, you know that I love you.” Jesus said, “Take care of my sheep.”
17 The third time he
said to him, “Simon son of John, do you love me?” Peter was hurt because Jesus asked him the third time, “Do
you love me?” He said, “Lord, you know all things; you know that I love you.”
Jesus said, “Feed my sheep.
18 Very truly I tell
you, when you were younger you dressed yourself and went where you wanted; but
when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress
you and lead you where you do not want to go.”
19 Jesus said this
to indicate the kind of death by which Peter would glorify God. Then he said to him, “Follow me!”
Everyone
Fails.
The title of this series uses the
word failures – plural. It’s not just one failure that is
recorded for these characters; it is multiple ones.
Failure is difficult enough, but when it becomes public, it is
especially difficult. Some people
have suffered such epic public failure that when their names are mentioned the
first thing that comes into our minds is their failure. In terms of failure, Peter’s were both
epic and public. How would you
like to be remembered for all time as the person who denied Jesus? And not just once, but three
times! And not just denying him,
but doing so while he is listening, as Luke adds this interesting bit of
information in his telling of Peter’s denials – The Lord turned and looked straight at Peter (Luke 22:61).
Were you aware of that verse?
Imagine what it must have been like for Peter, upon his third denial, to
witness Jesus turning to look at him and knowing he heard every harsh word of
his denials.
But it’s not just Peter. We could also talk
about Thomas’ failure of belief (John 20:24-29) or any number of other passages
in the Bible that tell us of the failures of people. One of the interesting aspects of Scripture is that it gives
us a “warts and all” view of its characters. Scripture does not hide the fact that its characters were
deeply flawed, nor does it hide their failures.
There are some things that are common to
humanity, and one of them is failure.
Everyone fails.
Everyone. If you are here
this morning, and feeling like a failure for some reason, guess what? You’re human! Give yourself a break!
Over the years of ministry I have listened to so many people who cannot
move beyond their failures. They
replay their failure over and over in their minds and cannot let it go. Give yourself a break, because you are
not the only person to fail.
But we also need to remember this – while we
need to give ourselves a break, we need to give others a break as well. One of the painful parts of failure is
that someone, somewhere, is keeping a scorecard of our failures. There is always someone who wants to
remind us of our failures, they want to hold them over our heads, and they want
to hold us down because of those failures. They will not only
remind you of your failures; they will pin them to you like a scarlet letter.
But here’s one of the really interesting
elements of the ministry of Jesus – he doesn’t allow that to happen. When you read the passages where Jesus
grants forgiveness there is an implied message that we need to hear – Jesus is
the one who releases us from our failures, which means that someone else can’t
hold us to them. When Jesus grants
forgiveness, someone was probably protesting, saying, I’m the one who was wronged!
I’m the one who should have the say in whether or not a person is
forgiven! But that’s not how
it works with Jesus. He releases
us from our failures, which means that no one else has the right or the claim
to hold that over us any longer.
Jesus released Peter from his denials.
Do not allow someone to lord your failures over
you.
Not
Every Failure Is a Failure.
Some failures may be perceived
as failures, but they aren’t failures as much as disappointed
expectations. You can’t live up to
everyone’s expectations, and I’m not sure you should. You can take that advice from me. I’ve disappointed my share of people over the years. Some people hold us to unrealistic
expectations and those expectations are ways in which they seek to control us.
But failure is also a tool by which
God brings about our growth and improvement. C. S. Lewis wrote that Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to
achievement. One fails forward toward success.
In spite of Peter’s failures we
could also say there was an element of success in some of them. Although Peter’s faith wavered when he
got out of the boat and he began to sink into the sea, he did get out of the
boat. None of the other disciples
did. And even when Peter denied
Jesus, we can point out that Peter was the only one of the disciples – the only
one – who followed after him when he was arrested. He went further than any of the others.
Through his failures, God shaped
Peter in new ways and each of those failures – though they were certainly
painful and had implications for him and for others – was a learning experience
and a step toward becoming the person God wanted Peter to be.
What have you learned from your
failures? Something, I
imagine. Could you really have
become the person you are without the lessons learned from failure? Probably not.
Grace
Overcomes Failure.
One lesson we learn about Jesus from the gospels is that he always
accepted people where they were.
Unfortunately, we don’t.
Sometimes, especially in churches, we expect people to get to a certain
point before we deem them acceptable.
Jesus never did that. Grace
was always a part of the way that Jesus dealt with the failures of people.
Our Scripture passage for this morning is one
that is very interesting, and often misinterpreted. Most people believe that Jesus asked Peter do you love me as a way of restoring
Peter after his denials, but that is not what was going on. I really don’t think Jesus would have
made Peter answer for each of those three denials. To me, it just doesn’t seem to be in the character of Jesus
to humiliate Peter in such a public way because of his denials.
What is really going on is a challenge issued
to Peter, his failure to rise to that challenge, and the grace that Jesus
extends. When we read this passage
in English, it is impossible to see what was really going on, but a quick
overview of the Greek will help us to see this. You have probably heard that the Greek language has four
different words for love. By using
different words, the Greek language is able to communicate specifically the
kind of love being discussed. The
first word is eros, which is a
romantic love, and from which we get our word erotic. The second
word is philos, which is the type of
love between friends. This is the
word from which we derive the name Philadelphia,
the city of brotherly love. The third word is storge, which is the love that exists between the members of a
family. The final word, and the
one we have heard of most often in a worship setting, is agape. Agape is the deepest, most faithful kind
of love imaginable. It is best
summed up by understanding it as a divine love, represented in the love of God.
The first time that Jesus asked Peter do you love me, John (John, the writer
of the gospel, was present at this exchange) uses the word philos – Peter do you love me
like a friend? To which Peter
replies with the same word – Jesus, you know
I love you like a friend. The
second time that Jesus asks Peter do you
love me, the word agape is used –
Peter, do you love me more than a
friend? Do you love me with the
kind of committed and sacrificial love that is expressed by God? When Peter responds, he once again uses
the word philos – Lord, you know I love you like a friend. The third time Jesus questions Peter he
returns to the word philos, as if to
say, Peter, will you not go further than
the love that is shared between friends?
Will you not go to agape love?
Peter, at this moment, is reserved in his love;
it is a failure to embrace Jesus with agape
love. But lest we be too hard on
Peter, it is safe to say we are not always at the point of agape love either. In
spite of the hesitation of Peter, Jesus offers him grace, and a task. Each time Peter responds, Jesus tells
him to take care of my sheep. Jesus does not wait until Peter is
perfect in his life or his love before offering him a task and a calling. The grace of God always overcomes
failure. Always.
When I finally managed to get to the house
where the church bus had its collision, it was really difficult to ring the
doorbell. The couple invited me in
and they were incredibly gracious to me.
Never once did they say anything in anger, never once did they bring it
up to me at a later time, never once did they allow anyone else to criticize me
over it. That’s grace, and grace
always triumphs over failure.
Never allow failure to define your life or who
you are!
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